How to Create and Keep Positive Beliefs

By Marilyn Stannett http://www.coachserve.com

The importance of what we believe….   

“Beliefs have the power to create and power to destroy”- a quote by Anthony Robins that I truly appreciate. Think of a time where you believed with utter certainty that you would achieve a goal? What were the things that you did to achieve that goal? How did your beliefs influence achieving your goal? I am curious to learn your stories. 

When I notice negative thoughts arising, I remember the Buddha’s famous words, “we are what we think.”

The concept that “we are what we think” motivates me to let go of negative thoughts about me or others’. If I am my thoughts, then I want to be careful to think positively. If we start with the universal truth that we are born with equal capacity to be brilliant and creative and remain faithful to that truth, I find that thinking then serves to supports us as individuals while also supporting humanity overall. Suddenly, everything shifts to a lighter place with more energy, less problems, and less need for critical judgement… a much happier and brighter space from which to live.

The sweetness of now…

When we focus attention on the present moment, we are free from ruminating about the past and worrying about the future. Rumination, regret, and anxiety are proven to be negative. While in that place what or who can it possibly help? Catch your thoughts; bring them to the present. 

We must take responsibility for our thoughts and actions.

Without conscious realization, it’s easy to place blame on situations for why we fall short, when we do. The hard truth is we can’t blame others or circumstances for our imperfections. We are ultimately responsible for ourselves. When we realize we are blaming circumstances we assume responsibility where it rightfully belongs- with us.

Find things to do that pull you away from negative beliefs.

This is fun. Think of things to do that are truly enjoyable to you that help lift you out of the dumps. Listen to music, go for a walk, work in the garden, meditate, kick box, roller blade, fly a kite, cycle- do what you enjoy- do it not only to lift yourself from a negative moment, but also keep yourself feeling positively great. Do it because you deserve it. So often we forget to make time for the activities that we love.

Find your inspiration.

I have always turned to reading or media that inspires me. For me, it’s taking 20 minutes to listen to a Ted talk at http://www.ted.org and reading a few pages from a favourite book. Recently I started collecting quotes. Visit my site to sign up for my free newsletter and gain access to a free download of my quote collection. http://www.coachserve.com. What inspires you? Set aside a few minutes each day to research a topic of personal interest to you.

Nurture social connections.

Reach out to friends and family who are supportive, positive, and non judgemental. Avoid those who are not. By nurturing positive relationships and letting go of negative ones we gain more energy to attract and create what we want more of by creating a life that reflects what we want more of. Negative people are a huge drain on our psychic and mental energy.

 Be magnificent, and remember, “Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones you’ll start having positive results”.

~Willie Nelson

I first became interested in the science of happiness when the coach training program I was taking offered a course in positive psychology with Chris Peterson, University of Michigan. I am so happy that the focus of psychological study has expanded to include what happens when things are going well for people. Dr. Martin Seligman’s vision to declare positive psychology as an area of study has reulted in so much learning about what helps people be their best.

What makes people want to change for the better? What’s going on with the people who see the glass half-full and not half-empty? How do they know this wisdom which for many, remains painfully elusive?

There is hope for people struggling with the half-empty glass. Empiracally researched information about how to see things, face things, and approach things with less fatalism is coming forth through the work of the positive psychologists. For those of us who need hard core scientific proof- it’s happening.

While recognizing the value of negative emotions and the harmful nature of suppressing them, it’s equally important to know that by nature, negative emotions constrict our thoughts and create a downward emotional spiral that we can be stuck in. On the other hand, positive emotions also build on themselves, creating positve upward emotional spirals that lift us from the dark, constricting, tank.

In her recently published book, “Positivity”, Barbara Fredrickson refers to a sailboat’s engineering as a metaphor to explain the need for both posive and negative emotions. Without a keel, (negative emotions), a sailboat will capsize in rough waters or winds and without sails (positive emotions), the boat will never catch the winds for motion.

By paying attention to what we are thinking, positive or negative, we can even the score.  Based on her research, Fredrickson explains her discovery- a 3:1 positivity ratio.  When we think three positive thoughts for each negative thought, we reach a “tipping point” that advances the score in favor of overall emotional well-being. As Mark Twain has said, “Drag your thoughts away from your troubles…by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it.”

“Snark is clever and funny and easy to spread. Snark protects us from confronting the truth of the situation, and snark is incredibly easy to do. Snark is fun, but it doesn’t look good on you.”

“In the long run, though, it’s those with right intention, a long term view and consistent persistence that manage to win”.

“Good thing, too”.

…Gets me thinking about intenetion which leads me to The Buddha’s EightFold Path as outlined in Ryuho Okawa’s “The Essence of Buddha, The Path to Enlightenment”.
Okawa says:
“As we live our everyday lives and come into constant contact with others, we tend to be swayed by an incessant flow of thoughts, and it is difficult to know the True Self that lies deep within us. However, when we retreat from everyday contact, away from others and from their vibrations, and reflect deeply on our own mind, we can find the True Self. When people are around, we may try to put on an act, maybe out of vanity or to offset our feelings of inferiority, but when we sit alone in meditation, the part of us that is true and honest will emerge. This is the purest part of our soul, connected to Buddha. The very beginning of the Eightfold Path is to examine our own thoughts and deeds from the perspective of this True Self.”

“Shakyamuni Buddha established eight checkpoints against which people can examine their own thoughts and deeds:
Right Seeing
Right Thought
Right Speech
Right Action
Right Living
Right Effort
Right Will
Right Meditation
He put the adjective ‘right’ to the eight directions of the mind and the actions of the physical body: seeing, thinking, speaking, acting, livng, making diligent efforts, the use of the will, and meditating. ‘Rightness’ in the Eightfold Path does not imply a simple set of model behaviours against which people can judge themselves to be right or wrong; it means a ‘right’ state that can only be attained throught deep contemeplation.”

While it’s alot to take in, the Eightfold Path is a great place to begin and check-in whether our intenetions are aligned with our True Self – what is true.

How to Free Your Mind of Negative

Thoughts

Negative thoughts are often false perceptions of ourselves that point to how we are lacking. As we all fall prey to toxic thoughts they become road blocks to our natural talents and abilities. These thought tapes run on play and are deeply embedded in our thought patterns, playing and replaying without our knowledge, holding us hostage to disabling and unreal beliefs, beliefs that paralyze us from taking action, moving forward, and stop our being who we need to be to have the most from life.

 Once we gain this awareness, we are empowered to dispel the negative for exactly what it is- a lie. Through awareness we notice the negative thought tape playing. The first step is to dismiss the negative thought. Without judging or berating ourselves for the negative thought, simply recognize it for what it is and let it go.

The universal truth that we are all capable of achieving what we desire, full of inherent ability available equally to each and every one of us is the universal truth  with which to replace toxic thoughts. As toxic thoughts arise, replace them with this spiritual principle of our individual and collective humanity. Cultivating compassion for ourselves and others creates the acceptance of our inherent greatness allowing space for focusing on our positive traits and abilities.